Ask the Expert:

In our ongoing Ask the Expert series, we pose practical questions to some of our very own faculty and staff experts. Here at USI, our tagline is "Knowledge for Life." That's a motto that should reach beyond our students to everyone in the USI community. If you have a question you'd like to see answered in our series, you can submit it for consideration.

Meet the expert:
Dr. Stephanie Cunningham
Senior Staff Psychologist, Outreach/Training Coordinator
USI Counseling Center

Here's what she had to say:

Obstacles to Coming Out

• For most people, it boils down to fear of what the consequences will be. Even if you're confident that the people in your life would be accepting, open and affirming, you're still taking a risk when you put yourself out there. There is a risk of rejection by family, friends and communities that are important to you - individuals may be open to the idea of LGBT in theory and less so in practice when it's relative or loved one.
  
  
• While progress has been made in our country, there are still more concrete issues that have consequences where there is no recourse - discrimination in their career or livelihood, access to housing, or other vital resources -are issues individuals need to be mindful of when deciding if it's in their best interest to be out.

Effects of Stereotypes

• Many individuals have internalized unfortunate stereotypes about what it means to be gay or to be in a same sex relationship. For people who identify as straight and haven't had a lot of interaction with individuals who identify as anything outside of heteronormative relationships, maybe all they know is the stigmatized and limited narrative they've seen in media.
  
  
• Some individuals have bought into the idea of "gay lifestyle." These stereotypes make us believe there's only one way to be gay or lesbian in our culture, and if someone doesn't adhere to that paradigm, it could create dissonance and confusion, and keep individuals from being open about who they are. They may have a more difficult time putting themselves out there if they feel like they need to change in order to be more aligned with what other people's expectations would be.

Becoming an Ally

• The fundamental part of being an ally is letting go of heterosexual privilege that comes along with your identity, and to not allow society's benefits and privileges to come along with being the majority. To be a committed ally, you must be willing to be connected with the minority and be okay with that, because otherwise you're trying to help while still holding on to your privilege. You have to be all in if you're truly going to be an ally.
  
  
• If you have a loved one who is out to you, don't try to coerce them into being more out than they're comfortable being, or not respecting their privacy and taking their power away by outing them to other people. Be someone they can trust. Listen to what LGBT individuals in your life tell you - recognize that they are going to be the expert in their own experiences. Don't assume you know more about who they are or what they need than they do.
  
  
• Strive to learn more about the tremendous diversity of all things related to sexuality and gender and the intersection of those aspects in our experience with other things like ethnicity or ability status. There's so much to learn, so being open to learning about other people's experiences is incredibly powerful, not just internalizing the limited narrative about what it means to identify as LGBT.
  
  
• Any kind of prejudice or oppression is not just the responsibility of the group experiencing that oppression. For people who believe in equality and social justice - it is incumbent for people who identify as part of a particular group to be open, feel able and comfortable - make people more aware of the diversity of that experience.

October 11 is National Coming Out Day, an annual celebration to help raise awareness about LGBT issues and encourage individuals to openly acknowledge and celebrate their sexual identity. To show your support, visit the information table in the University Center East Lobby from 12:30 to 2 p.m. on October 12.

The University of Southern Indiana offers diversity resources such as Safe Zone, to educate students about issues concerning LGBT individuals and increase the diversity of USI faculty, staff and students.